Parenting the Unconscious
A group education + transformation experience that will help you to master the most important areas of your life
This 4 part series will help you to show up authentically, spend your time doing what you love, revitalize your relationships and teach your children how to be happy.
Is parenting everything you thought it would be?
If you are like most parents we work with, you set out to be the kind of parent your kids would look up to. You put your kids first and did your best to give your kids more than your parents did for you.
You want to give the best of yourself to your kids and enjoy what you are doing.
But the hard reality is that parenthood awakens and magnifies our deepest inner struggles, fears and unresolved trauma. So that even though you love your kids, you still find yourself overreacting, catastrophizing or just going through the motions of your own life.
Are you as happy as you want your kids to be?
Your kids will learn more from watching you than anything else they are taught.
Yet most parents’ daily lives are dominated by hurry, stress, anxiety and fear. The patterns your kids learn now are the same ones they will fall back on their own lives.
That’s why how you live your life today affects your child's tomorrow. YOU are the blueprint they will take with them.
Feeling great about who you are, loving your daily life and taking inspired action to create what you want is more important than a clean house, the right enrichment activities, or even a top college.
We'll help you build a blueprint for happiness
Over the years we’ve helped parents go from reactive to connected and to recreate their lives to work for them and their kids. And we’ve discovered which tools get results fast.
When you are already struggling to make time for yourself, the last thing you need is another set of strategies and coping mechanisms that are hard to remember or apply.
We make change at the deepest level of the mind so that your natural ability to love and connect shines through without trying.
Courses That Address What You Really Need
Our 4 part series addresses the key areas of your life, as a parent and human, and catalyzes tangible change from the inside out. Each topic is a powerful standalone experience. Taken together they will bring exponential change to the lives of you and your family.
No longer recognize yourself?
Discover who you really are, how to make change in the part of the mind that drives your actions and reactions, and begin to master your behaviors instead of letting them master you.
This is an essential first course.
Use Your Time Wisely
Is there NEVER enough time?
Get to the bottom of what’s really driving your choices; shift how you spend your time from draining and obligatory to energizing and restorative; and clear the unconscious fears and beliefs that limit your freedom.
Play Well with Others
Do you long to feel seen, heard and appreciated?
Transform your relationships—starting with yourself— and re-energize, reinforce and restore the connections that matter most. Learn how to connect, express yourself honestly, and ask for what you want in a supportive and empowering environment.
Free Your Child's Mind
Do you want to do better for your kids than your parents did for you?
Get parenting superpowers. See past your childrens’ words and actions to what they really need, and respond in ways that empower them and arm them with the tools to reach their potential in the environment they need to thrive.
Be authentic, feel free, love how you spend your time, enjoy fulfilling relationships and teach your children how to live meaningful, fulfilling lives.
Is this for you?
These programs are for parents who have recognized that their choices and behaviors, both conscious and automatic, have led them to where they are now and are ready to make change from the inside out.
If this sounds like you, you are in the right place.
You want more for yourself and your kids
Do you want something better?
You know things aren’t working or could be better. You also know that the only way things will change is if you do something different. You may not know what that change is yet, but you are ready to start.
You are willing to do the work
Are you willing to take action?
Awareness is valuable, but it’s not enough to make change.
You are willing to experiment, make changes and bring your ideas into reality.
You are ready to play full out
Are you all in?
You get out what you put in.You are ready to show up, participate fully, do the work and be a support to the other committed parents in the program.
Here's how to get your results
~3 per course
Attend live or watch recorded weekly instruction calls
Participate in live weekly workshops & group coaching sessions
Attend one on one coaching calls
Take positive action in your life
You will take action to
Restore balance to your life
Get tools to manage overwhelm and restore yourself to a state of calm so you can handle the very things that are causing it. Then guide you through a process to restore balance in your own life, get hours of your week back, and amp up the energy, joy and meaning in your day to day.
Make positive changes in your family
Connect your learnings to the underlying principles of many popular parenting approaches so that you can adapt them to work in your family. Recognize, value, and parent the child you have and redefine your role as a parent. Recognize and protect your children (and yourself) from psychological harm and manipulation by self interested and exploitative individuals and organizations.
Pass this knowledge on to your kids
Learn and apply practical tools for working with your children's unconscious minds to support their healthy mental & emotional development, self confidence, empowerment, self-expression and independence, and give them the tools to do it for themselves.
Communicate with the Unconscious
Harness the power of your unconscious mind to create what you want, and give you a practical tool kit for communicating with others in a way that is easy for them to receive.
You will learn to
Unlock the unconscious Mind
Gain a foundational understanding of the powerful role of the unconscious mind in memory, values, beliefs, behavior and emotions so that you can reinforce your child’s natural confidence and self trust while avoiding common parenting pitfalls that undermine your child’s innate self worth.
Connect & be present
Learn the physical and mental secrets behind deep connection that you can apply with your family right away and avoid the typical ways we break unconsciously connection with those we love most.
Meet your child’s psychological needs
Understand the essential components of human motivation and psychological well being, rooted in decades of research, so that you can quickly identify the root of challenges and desires in your children and ensure that their fundamental psychological needs are being met.
Support healthy development and set right expectations
Learn a powerful model of human development that underpins behaviors and values in children and adults so that you can support your children’s development and avoid accidentally holding them back.
Be the best version of yourself
Surface YOUR personal, unconscious values, beliefs and filters so that you can understand the unique drivers, motivators that underpin your current way of engaging with and creating your world.
What to expect
Do you no longer recognize yourself?
Do you feel stuck in a role (nurturer, homemaker, breadwinner) that you didn’t sign up for?
Are you exhausted by working for things you fundamentally don’t care about?
Do you long for the part of yourself that used to have fun, play and really live?
Are you missing purpose and identity beyond your kids, partner or job?
Are you frustrated or discouraged by repeating destructive patterns again and again despite your best efforts?
Have you figured out that your behaviors won’t change just because you want them to?
How you behave and the choices you make determine the life you create and how successful you are in it—from your relationships, to your wealth, to your health and happiness. It also determines what’s possible for your children and their probable outcomes. Yet---as neuroscience reveals, YOU are NOT your behaviors. So who ARE you and why DO you behave the way you do? More importantly, how can you start behaving in ways that give you greater happiness, purpose and possibility to create the life you WANT? How can you feel and act like the person you know you really are, parent better, partner better and create a ripple of positive impact simply by being yourself? The answer is not in another book—or you would have it already. The secret that no one told you about is in your unconscious mind. And the reason you do what you do is unique to YOU which is why a one size fits all solution doesn’t work.
During this guided group journey you will discover who you really are, how to make change in the part of the mind that drives behavior, and begin to master your behaviors instead of letting them master you.
Over 6 transformational weeks of instruction and workshops, you will: map your unique mind, unearth your unconscious drivers, create goals that excite you, release the negative emotions and limiting beliefs that are in your way, and unlock the power of your WHOLE mind to bring your personal vision into reality.
Use Your Time Wisely
Is there never enough time?
Are you both exhausted AND bored by how you spend it?
Do you know something’s gotta give, but don't even have time to think about it?
Are you spending so much time planning, managing and prioritizing the "shoulds" that you aren't making time for what's important to YOU?
Are you angry or resentful because you carry the weight in the family while everyone else gets to play?
Are you ready to get hours of your week back and get into the driver’s seat of your life? Buckle up.
Time is the one thing we can never get back or make more of. How we use it determines our level of happiness and success in all aspects of our lives. It is also a reflection of what’s actually important to us. But what does it mean when what we know to be important doesn’t match with where our time is going? More importantly, what can we do about it? The answer lies in the unconscious mind, the seat of our memory, behavior and values. We all have aspirational values - those things we consciously know are important when we choose them from a list. But the real drivers of our behavior are the ones we didn’t choose—the unconscious ones we got from the people around us when we were too young to remember, let alone make a choice. Values, along with fears, beliefs and unmet needs drive us to put our most precious resources—our time and attention—on things that don’t always lead to happiness, connection or fulfillment. Perfectionism, people pleasing, ‘have to’s’, and ‘shoulds’ are just a few of the reasons we fill our schedules with activities that leave us tired and unable to do the things we know matter most. Fortunately, whether it seems like it or not, we do have a choice. And when we get to the root cause of what’s driving these choices, we have the ability to make change.
It’s time to reset your drivers and start using your time wisely.
During this 8 week group journey we will get to the bottom of what’s really driving your choices; build and begin to execute a staged plan for shifting how you spend your time from draining and obligatory, to energizing and restorative; and work directly with your unconscious mind to clear fears and beliefs that are limiting your freedom. We will also provide loads of practical advice, strategies and resources that you can use right away as you make changes to dramatically improve the quality of your life and start loving how you spend your time.
Play Well with Others
Are you resentful of your partner for not carrying the weight?
Do you feel like you are always trying to get other people to do stuff they don’t want to?
In the hustle of parenting, have you put your romantic relationship in the back seat?
Have you forgotten how to play?
Do you struggle to be present and feel connected with your kids or partner?
Are you aware of how quickly your window of influence with your kids is closing?
Do you long to feel seen, heard and appreciated?
Did you know that your social isolation has a direct impact on your child’s mental health? Of all the psychological needs, connection may be the most important for our mental and emotional health. We are hardwired from birth to connect and love the people closest to us. As parents, we are often surrounded by loved ones, children, parents, partners, other parents. And yet, a shockingly high number of parents still feel deeply lonely. Sharing our whole selves, feeling deeply, being present and making agreements that feel good—these are essential qualities of relationships that meet our needs for connection and sustain us through the hard times.
So why is it sometimes easier to experience this with a stranger on a plane than with the people closest to us?
The answer is in our unconscious minds—the seat of memory, behavior and emotions. Every word, every action, every expression we make and perceive is linked to a specific meaning in our minds. Often those connections were created before we were old enough to even remember, while our partner or child or parent has a totally different set of connections and meanings for the same word, action and look. This difference in meaning is why you can be saying the same words but still feel like you are in a totally different conversation. At the same time, we live in a culture that actively teaches us to suppress and distort what’s true from early childhood, while the fast pace of this time period makes it seem hard to just stop and be present. Put those factors together and you have a recipe for the loneliness pandemic that has exploded over the last 15 years.
In this course you will begin to transform your relationships—starting with yourself—so that you can re-energize, reinforce and restore the connections that matter most and learn how to get what you truly need. You will learn how to connect, express yourself honestly, ask for what you want and make new agreements. Finally, you will release many of the unconscious negative emotions and beliefs from your past that are keeping you from being yourself in the present.
Free Your Child's Mind
You want to do better for your kids than your parents did for you, yet it's often a struggle to balance their needs and your own. Wouldn't it be great if you knew all the ‘right’ things about parenting, especially when making decisions in the face of uncertainty?
Have you found the techniques in books don’t really work in your family?
Do you worry about the influence of the media?
Does your child seem shut down, defiant or secretive?
Every parent wants their child to be happy, healthy and free. As parents, we invest massive amounts of time and money to give our kids what they need so they can go out and live happy, successful lives. Many of us are also actively working to break the negative parenting cycles we were raised with. And yet, in spite of all of the effort and love, why are our kids still angry, depressed, disconnected or rebellious? The truth is, with all the best intentions, most parents unwittingly undermine their children’s self worth and abilities. This happens in three ways. The first is that we totally misunderstand what’s going on with our kids and then respond in the wrong ways—this is because no one teaches us how to separate our perceptions from reality, what humans actually need to thrive, what drives behavior, or when to hold and when to let go. The second is because we understand our children through the lens of ourselves, attaching meaning, judgment and fear to places they don’t belong. Finally, and perhaps most importantly, our children’s experience of themselves and what is possible begins with what we show them is possible in our own lives. When parents try to meet their kids’ needs at the expense of their own, or fail to live their lives with freedom and joy, this shapes their child’s vision of what life can and should be.
This course gives you a foundational understanding of all of these areas and tools to actually do something about it plus direct work with your unconscious mind to reprogram some of the misperceptions that were hardwired in when YOU were a child. We cover human needs through the lens of child development, practices to restore connection and rebuild trust, and a toolkit to help reverse some of the psychological limits your child has already begun creating for themselves. With this knowledge and tools you can begin to see past your childrens’ words and actions to what they really need, and respond in ways that empower them and arm them with the tools and environment they need to thrive.